I had an opportunity tonight to join a Naxx-10 pick-up raid for their final encounter with Kel’Thuzad. I was all gung-ho and enthused about it, until I was told that the only drop I wanted from it, the axe, was being reserved by the raid leader. Hell no. I don’t play this game to gear people I don’t know and have no loyalty to. I have no problem with assisting in the gearing up of guildmates, but some dude reserving loot for himself? No. There’s only a handful of people in that game that I would allow to dictate terms to me for raiding, and that guy wasn’t one. Maybe I should have gone, and rolled on it anyways, but then I’d just have been dishonest about agreeing to his rules.

I don’t get to raid with my guild all that often (a total of twice so far since I hit 70 in September, and one of them was rather informal), mainly because I’m either at work or asleep when the raids start, and to be honest, I have a sneaking suspicion that even if I were there and ready, other more regular raiders would be picked over me, just because granting me loot likely wouldn’t produce any returns for the guild in future raids, which I would likely miss because of work and sleep. This isn’t a dig at any perceived unfairness in my guild’s loot distribution methods, but giving drops that are intended to help increase the power of a raid force to a person who is rarely a member of the raid force, is kind of a wasted drop in my opinion. I probably wouldn’t hand a level 213 item to me either in those circumstances.

This sort of thing has been on my mind a lot lately, since regular Naxx raiding has picked up now that more people are online following the holidays. Lately I’ve been filtering out guild chat while raids are going, just because getting spammed by achievements and the occasional loot bragging only serves to remind me that I’m not there. As somebody who was always there, and always right in the middle of it in EQ, that bugs me. It provides me with a sense of being left out, though I know not deliberately so. I’ve been thinking lately that if I didn’t like the people I’m guilded with so much, that I’d probably have left already for some other guild with a more accommodating raid schedule.

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